TLV Inbox

[general_affairs]

★ RENO
You know who it is. Leave a message; I'll be in touch.

---

FF VII COMPILATION

source @ isopods

Comments

[love_and_peace]

[ Boo. Get a man's hopes up about being a frog and then deny him the dream. What a jerk.

Vash shoots Reno a glance out of the corner of his eye because yes, at the time Sebastian had been unarmed. And in Zero, which had negated any superhuman abilities he possessed.

But that detail -- and more, apparently -- are in the unopened folder, sitting innocently between them on the bar top. ]

No.

[ No, that's not all that's going to be in there. It's really too thick for that. How much of his hundred and fifty-plus years are documented in that packet? Knives will be all over the contents, he's sure of that. There's no way to write a report on Vash the Stampede and not include Millions Knives. The battle of Octovern might be in there. The fall might be in there.

July might be in there.

In one smooth motion, Vash tips back his glass and downs the entire pint in a couple long swallows. He's going to need a lot more than beer for this, but the beer's a good start. ]

[general_affairs]

[ Bet. Get him some Gongaga frogs and watch chaos descend upon the ship!

He watches quietly as Vash picked up his glass and raised a brow. He cocked his head with a small shrug of resignation, and scooped up his glass to do much the same. He's unable to knock it back as efficiently as Vash, but he does get there! An empty glass gets set down with a little gulp of air. ]

Fuck--warn a guy.

[ He pressed a fist against the center of his chest and suppressed a burp. He was woefully out of practice with waterfalling drinks like that. ]

No need to panic, yo. I'm not gonna drill you on it.

[love_and_peace]

[ Vash sets his glass down with a sigh -- it's been awhile since he pounded a beer, and he forgot hos breathless it leaves him! -- looking over with surprise to see Reno keeping up. Ah, that was the plan though, wasn't it? Drink under the table, together?

All right then. ]

You might not say that after you see what's in here.

[ If he waits any longer he's going to lose his nerve so Vash takes the folder and opens it abruptly enough that the paper envelope tears a little. Even before he takes the whole pile out he can see that it's not just printed pages -- there's photographs in there too, and the tattered edges of a piece of paper that he's pretty sure is one of his old wanted posters. Admiral sure does his homework, huh?

But he stops there, at the cover page. It's blank, other than the title INMATE FILE FOR VASH SAVEREM. Vash stays so still, staring at that page, that he forgets to breathe. ]

[general_affairs]

You show me yours, I'll show you mine.

[ He slid the glasses away, watching as Vash instead snatched up the file to rip open. He'd glance at the stack of papers and everything woven throughout, then up to his frozen inmate, brows raising. If he was alarmed, he hid it well behind a veneer of a much milder mere curious concern.

His brows knitted after a moment, and he'd reach out to put a hand on his forearm. ]

Set it down for a second.

[love_and_peace]

[ The dirty joke lands just enough for Vash to huff out a short little laugh, but it's going to take more than that to tear his eyes away from the page. Even when Reno lays a hand on his arm and makes it a command -- friendly, well-intentioned, but still an order -- Vash can only glance away from the words for the briefest second. ]

That's not my name.

[ Vash Saverem. Is it the Admiral's idea of a joke? An aspiration, something Vash is supposed to strive for? It's cruel, is what it is. It's unfair.

They're going to need a lot more drinks. ]

I don't get to claim that name.

[general_affairs]

[ His head cocks at the slightest of angles and his focus sharpens to stay on Vash, minding his body language. As the other looked away, he pulled his hand back and instead propped his chin on the heel of his palm again.

He didn't look on the verge of a panic attack any more, at least. He flicked his free hand up when the bartender looked their way, ordering two more drinks. ]

Kinda hard to believe that, not gonna lie.

[ A casual hum as he mused out loud. ]

What d'you think about me? Y'know, the kind'a person I am.

[love_and_peace]

[ Look, he expected these pages to be filled with an accunting of all the death he's caused, not... not to remind him right off of the mother figure he'd ultimately betrayed.

But Reno's still talking, and his question is about himself, so Vash drags himself out of his swirling memories and tries to force his brains to work again. ]

What kind of person? ...You're quick, and funny. You're a good fighter and you enjoy it, but you're not cruel. You have a good heart.

[ He glances up at Reno's hair, and cracks a smile. ]

You're a little vain. Generous though. Why?

[general_affairs]

[ There was little point in trying to push the subject. Clearly Vash was wildly distressed, and this being a public space wasn't somewhere he needed to press Vash about traumas or process feelings that clearly hit like a steel chair.

The comment to his vanity made him snort with a laugh and crack a vulpine grin, one that was toothy and a little lopsided. It was true, certainly. ]

I wanna know how thick you think my ledger would be.

[love_and_peace]

[ Ah. That's where he was going with that.

Vash runs a finger along the thick edge of the ledger, feeling the weight of a hundred and fifty years. Reno's, what, twenty five? Barely a sixth as old. Even him being a soldier shouldn't make it more than a few pages... but it's really kind of him to suggest otherwise. ]

For a kid like you? It'd be...

[ He flips just the edges of the pages, sectioning off a pinch of the whole as a visual demonstration of the difference in their ages. ]

Nothing..

[general_affairs]

Kid--!?

[ Sir they looked the same age what did Vash mean kid--

He snorted with a haughty pout to his lower lip and a stern furrow of his brows. If he didn't look like a kid before, he could've now. ]

You look barely older than me. Also: ding-dong, you'd be wrong.

[love_and_peace]

[ Reno looks like a full on brat pouting like that, and it makes Vash want to flick his ear.

Thanks, friend. This is helping. ]

Well, let's just say that this handsome ding-dong looks incredible for his age.

[ And whatever crimes Reno thinks would pad out his ledger, Vash is sure that they're nothing compared to what's in his stack of paper right here. He flips over that cover page as he speaks, and oh. There she is. There's text on the page that talks about how Vash and his brother were found in the bulb of a water plant, plenty of dates and details about his early development, but Vash's attention is entirely on that picture. Hi Rem. ]

[general_affairs]

Yeah? How old are you, then?

[ He tips his head a bit to follow Vash's gaze back down to the stack of papers, and of course sees the picture. A thoughtful sound bubbles from his throat as he reaches for the page, but he had stopped well before taking it. ]

'You mind if I take a look?

[ The bartender slides two more pint glasses their way, and goes back to their other customers. ]

[love_and_peace]

[ He's not going to let the picture out of his sight, but he gladly turns the page it's clipped to so that Reno can have a better view. ]

That's Rem.

[ Oh, no, his voice feels thick and heavy, that's no good! They're just getting started! Thankfully there's more beer to wash that knot away, before he tries again. ]

Rem Saverem. And me. And my brother.

[ The picture had to have been taken from one of the ship's security cameras, because there hadn't been anyone else awake at the time! How did the Admiral get this?! That ship burned before it ever hit the atmosphere, and all the internal data with it.

Didn't it? ]

[general_affairs]

[ He could see it well enough beforehand, but it was the intention behind specifically asking to see it. If it was a moment he wanted to share right now. Some lines of words he caught initially, and after looking briefly at the photo, he'd skimmed through some of the text again. ]

Oh, she's pretty.

[ It's a simple phrase, but it wasn't simply said. His tone was thoughtful and a little soft. ]

Twins. And you're both blond there.

[love_and_peace]

[ The text doesn't give away much. His birthday is 21 July 2406 local time. The plant that birthed them never came back online and was automatically recycled a day later. There's a long list of educational modules that he completed in that first year, some vital statistics that show that by his first birthday, he appeared to be a healthy and happy six year old. No allergies, minimal childhood injuries, no illnesses reported.

There's something at the bottom of the page about someone or something called Tesla, but Vash has his hand over that part. ]

Yeah.

[ He's still got about three bright blond hairs right at his left temple, but the rest has been black for more than a year. ]

His name was Knives. ...He liked to pretend that he was older, but I think he just liked telling me what to do.

[ She was pretty. Once Vash works up the courage to turn the page, he's going to slip that picture into his pocket... but he's not there yet. ]

[general_affairs]

[ It was like reading through some of the Science Department's files, and it made him tilt his head a bit. There was a glance back at the photo again, but then he visibly focused on his glass, giving Vash a modicum of privacy with his thoughts while picking up the glass.

Some of the small details fell into place, primarily about his dietary choices, some of the dodginess about those conversations. It was easy to surmise Vash had a lot in common with Aerith. Maybe. ]

It's kinda cute when you whine, so I can't really blame him.

So was she your mom?

[love_and_peace]

[ The only acceptable response to being called cute is to stick his tongue out at Reno. ]

She raised us.

[ Which is neither a yes nor a no, although with the name on the frontspiece, it's pretty clear what the answer is. ]

She was all by herself with two babies, and she raised us with love and compassion, and taught us about generosity, and bravery..

[ No, this page has been open long enough. Vash plucks her picture from the clip and sets it on the bar top so he can keep looking at it, and he flips quickly past the next few pages in the ledger, skimming for more photos. Vash's voice changes here, getting more serious. He's telling an important story instead of reminiscing about his mom, and it's not an easy story to tell. ]

There was a... an accident. [ Which is a baldfaced lie, but please let him tell it. ] We were part of a fleet of colony ships, headed for a forest world. A thousand ships, and a billion people in cryosleep, waiting to walk the surface of their new home. But there was an accident.

[ It's not any more believable the second time he says it, and he's stopped flipping through pages, pausing on one with another picture. ]

She put us into the escape pod, but she stayed behind. Millions of lives were saved because of her. Almost a hundred ships, saved.

[ The page that picture of Knives is attached to has a report of a mass murder at a plant facility. All the plant engineers, and a dozen civilians outside, cut to pieces by a tremenous, unidentified force. Vash quietly takes that picture too, and sets it next to the family shot. ]

She taught me that every life has value. That everyone's future is unwritten.

[general_affairs]

[ A huff of a laugh at the response as he stopped his beer. There was nothing meant or insinuated by the compliment and tease all wrapped up into one word, so he moved on as Vash did, picking up on the nuance of the answer. The context more or less confirmed his thoughts, though he continued to listen in respectful silence.

He didn't fault Vash for wanting more keepsakes, not with how upset he'd been over losing Rude's sunglasses.

He had become quite skilled at minding the stories his body language could tell when he was conscientious of it. At present he let himself be thoughtful, openly mulling over the given story. ]

For what it's worth, someone said that the dead only really die when their name's spoken for the last time.

[ He sucked in a deep breath through his nose, and went back to watching with his cheek in his palm. What Vash wanted to do with that was up to him. He glanced off to she side for a moment, then came back to the conversation, offering an easy scapegoat if Vash wanted to change the focus for a little bit. ]

She did a good job with you though. Raising kids alone ain't easy. It took over a dozen of us to look after a kid.

[love_and_peace]

[ and with that reminder of the conversation he had with Varker just a few days ago, Vash carefully closes the packet. There's plenty more to read in there (and more pictures too, if the clips he can see at the edges are any indication) but he'll do that in private.

He was willing to confess his crimes to Reno -- the destruction of July, Legato's murder, his failure to save Wolfwood or Knives -- but he can't talk about both Rem and Legato in one sitting. He can't.

So he'll take that offer of a change of topic and turn, resting his arm on the closed folder and picking up his beer with an attempt at a grin. ]

Just one kid? And here I thought you were some kind of brilliant leader!

[general_affairs]

Oooh yeah, and you've met her.

[ He said nothing on it, and continued not to fuss over the way his smiles were forced. ]

Aerith's a brat.

Me, leader? Nah, I hate admin work.
But we're basically intelligence soldiers. We're called Turks, and handle anything and everything for ShinRa, yo. Things I'm proud of, and things I'm not.

[love_and_peace]

Aerith?

[ Reno helped raise her? Huh! He wouldn't have guessed from either of their ages... although it's possible that Aerith came here from a later date, given how loosely the Barge seems to work with space and time both.

And look, a forced smile is better than not attempting one at all, right? Vash is a big fan of the fake-it-til-you-make-it school of being okay. For him, this is doing great! This is great.

Everything's great. ]

I suppose being a soldier means you have to do a lot of things you don't want to.

[ He's keeping things light, but the sympathy in his expression is real. He's met enough soldiers -- usually from the other end of their guns -- to know what a soldier's life can be like. ]

But that's the good thing about being alive! Every day is a new opportunity to make up for yesterday's mistakes.

[general_affairs]

Yep. Chief was lookin' after her when me and Rude joined up, and we all pitched in. The rest of it's her story to tell if she wants to, though.

[ Undoubtedly, Vash will eventually learn where Reno draws lines, so enjoy the peace while it lasts. He'd chuckle into his glass as he lifted it to take another sip. ]

It does. We got the icky jobs alright, but that meant your guys like Zack and Cloud got to be the heroes they needed to be. I'll take that trade-off, buuuut I don't beat myself up so much over it any more. I could, but I had to forgive myself eventually.

[love_and_peace]

[ Vash makes a bit of a face when Cloud's name is mentioned. He doesn't really have anything against the guy, but he definitely came off as exactly what he accused Vash of being -- a hero who rushed to action without considering all the consequences first.

Knowing that back where Reno's from. Cloud got to keep his hands clean while Reno had to do whatever it is that he's hinting at just makes that dislike stronger. He's not a fan. ]

Yeah? [ Vash pats the closed folder beneath his arm, then scoopos up the pictures on the bar top to slip them into his pocket. Those are going straight to his cabin wall, as soon as he can find something to serve as a pushpin. ] You'll have to teach me that trick sometime.

[general_affairs]

[ He raised a brow, then snorted with a laugh at the face made about Cloud. ]

Oh it's easy, just forgive yourself, d'uh.

[ He rolled his eyes with a smirk at his own facetious joke, then shook his head after and knocked back another swallow of beer. ]

Not a party trick I'd recommend, it's a pain in the ass. But we can see about getting some frames for those if you want. I can show you what I'm talkin' about after if you want, but it's not gonna be easy to watch, and it's already been a rough day for you.

[love_and_peace]

[ Oh, sure, why didn't he just think of that! Just forgive himself, no problem!

That's all right. He doesn't actually deserve forgiveness for any of the things he's done in this folder, aside from the occasional theft out of desperation, and maybe a couple bar fights where nobody ended up seriously injured. The rest? He's going to carry the rest in his heart for as long as he lives, and that's how it should be.

He's the only person who remembers most of those folks now anyway.

The comment about frames gets a half a shrug -- sure, maybe! That's a nice idea, actually -- but then Reno's offer to show him what he's been talking about gets a confused, wary kind of look. ]

What do you mean, show me?

[ Show him pictures of the armies he fought against? Entries in newspapers, maybe, talking about assassinations? He's got copies of those?

Wait. Was he an inmate before? Is he talking about having a copy of his own ledger? ]

Show me what?